Hey Mama, We See You!
We see the love you pour into your little one, the way you push through exhaustion, the way you carry the weight of it all—sometimes without anyone noticing. We see the moments when you smile on the outside but feel like you're barely holding it together on the inside.
If no one has told you lately, let us be the ones to say it: You matter—your well-being matters.
We know what they’ve told us—
"Mothers don’t have time to be tired."
"Just pray about it."
"Black women have always been strong."
And we know how easy it is to believe that caring for yourself is a luxury.
But, Mama, caring for your mind is just as vital as caring for your baby. You deserve to feel whole.
When it isn’t “Baby Blues”
If you’ve felt anxious, overwhelmed, sad, or numb for weeks—this isn’t just a rough patch. Maternal mental health conditions, like postpartum depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress, are real.
And here’s the thing: they are very common.
Black Women Experience Maternal Mental Health Conditions at Higher Rates
Black women experience postpartum depression at higher rates than white women but are half as likely to receive treatment. Research shows that 1 in 3 Black women will experience postpartum depression, yet they are less likely to be screened, diagnosed, or treated than their white counterparts (Giscombé, 2010).
This disparity isn’t because Black women don’t recognize their struggles—it’s because the system isn’t built to recognize us. Doctors may dismiss our symptoms, assume we are "strong enough" to handle it, or fail to offer resources that truly meet our needs. At the same time, stigma within our own communities can make it harder to reach out for help.
The Superwoman Burden: Why We Struggle to Ask for Help
Dr. Cheryl Woods Giscombé’s research on the “Superwoman Schema” explains why many Black women feel pressured to carry everything alone. We’ve been taught to be the caregivers, the providers, the ones who make sure everyone else is okay—even when we are drowning.
This mindset comes from generations of survival, from a history that demanded our strength. But constantly pushing through stress, grief, and trauma without support is not sustainable. Holding everything in doesn’t make us stronger—it wears us down. We were never meant to carry this alone.
Dr. Woods Giscombé’s book, The Black Woman’s Guide to Coping with Stress, is a wonderful resource. It provides insight into how chronic stress impacts Black women and offers practical strategies to break the cycle of overwork, self-neglect, and emotional exhaustion. If you've ever felt you have to hold everything together at the expense of your well-being, this book is for you.
Racial Stress, Anxiety, and the Stigma Around Seeking Help
Dr. Angela Neal-Barnett, a leading psychologist, has spent years studying how racial stress and anxiety impact Black women’s mental health. She explains that Black women are not just navigating motherhood—they are navigating a world that too often devalues their pain, overlooks their struggles, and dismisses their voices.
In her book, Soothe Your Nerves: The Black Woman’s Guide to Understanding and Overcoming Anxiety, Panic, and Fear, she breaks down how anxiety uniquely affects Black women and how cultural stigma keeps many of us from getting the help we deserve.
You Deserve Support
We know asking for help isn’t always easy. Maybe you don’t know where to start. Maybe you're afraid of being judged. Maybe you've been taught that therapy is “not for us.” But, Mama, healing is for you. Peace is for you. Getting the care you need is not a weakness—it’s power.
Let’s say this loud and clear:
💜 You are not failing.
💜 You are not alone.
💜 You are not supposed to do this by yourself.
Ways to Take Care of Yourself
Self-care isn’t just bubble baths and candles (though if that helps, do it!). Real self-care is about getting what you need to feel supported and whole.
✨ Seek help. Therapy, group support, or even talking to a trusted friend can be life-changing. You don’t have to struggle alone. Find a therapist who understands you—therapy is for us, too.
✨ Rest without guilt. Sleep when you can. Pause when you need to. Rest is a right, not a reward.
✨ Say no. You don’t have to be everything to everyone. Protect your peace.
✨ Breathe. Deep breathing, meditation, or journaling can help ease anxiety. Even five minutes of stillness can make a difference.
✨ Move your body. Dance, walk, stretch—whatever feels good to you. Movement releases stress and reminds you that you are here, alive, and worthy of care.
✨ Ask for what you need. Whether it’s a hug, a moment alone, or help with the baby—ask. You don’t have to do this by yourself.
Take the First Step
If you’ve been waiting for a sign to put yourself first—this is it. You are not alone in this. Support groups, therapists, and communities are ready to walk with you.
You deserve joy, too.
Your well-being is worth it.
You are worth it.
Maternal Mental Health Resources
A community-driven initiative dedicated to maternal and infant health, focusing on providing mental health support and resources for Black mothers. FOZ offers **peer support, education, and advocacy** to ensure every mother receives the care she deserves.
The Shift with Dr. Alicia Hodge
Dr. Alicia Hodge, a licensed clinical psychologist, provides practical tools for managing stress and anxiety, particularly for Black women navigating motherhood and life transitions.
The Loveland Foundation was founded by Rachel Cargle and is committed to providing financial assistance for therapy to Black women and girls. Their Therapy Fund helps connect individuals with culturally competent mental health professionals to ensure that cost is not a barrier to care.
A widely respected platform that connects Black women to **culturally competent therapists** and provides educational resources about mental health. They also have a podcast that discusses common mental health concerns in an approachable and relatable way.
Postpartum Support International
Postpartum Support International (PSI) has a dedicated initiative for Black mothers that offers online support groups, resources, and a helpline.